Lent Reflection, Day 31, April 5

Then all the disciples deserted him and fled.
Matthew 26:56

Additional Reading: Hebrews 10:32-39

If only our feet were not such cowards. If only they would listen to our best estimates of our spiritual courage and spiritual resolve and not the immediate impulse of our heart that defaults to cowardice. Jesus has fallen into the hands of angry men and the disciples – all of them, not just Peter – have fled and run away. And though we may promise ourselves or even convince ourselves that we would never have done that, hard personal experience proves otherwise.

There was the time that Jesus fell into the hands of angry men around the water cooler at work and you turned away and said nothing in his defense. And there was the time in the hallway after class when Jesus fell into the hands of angry men and you said nothing as his name was reviled and mocked. And there was the time with your neighbors that Jesus fell into the hands of angry men and you let the conversation go unchecked and He was once more ridiculed, his Body, the Church, vilified and broken with wounding words. And there was the time … and there was the time … and there was the time … “all the disciples deserted him and fled.”

Everyday, when we wake up, let us ask God for courage not to desert him, not to flee. Then when the moment comes and Jesus falls into the hands of angry men, let us tell our heart what to fear and our feet what to do. Let us not abandon him by default.

Prayer: Father, I am not what I imagine myself to be nor what I always thought I would be. But in your strength, I can be all you want me to be. Lord God, help even one such as me to stand and not run away. Amen.